Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Clean Up Your Mess - the Rev. Dr. Kikanza Nuri


Rev. Kikanza was a guest in the pulpit of Covenant Presbyterian Church, Sunday, April 11, 2010. You can visit her website by click HERE.

Clean Up Your Mess

Proverbs
1:7       The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction.
10:8     The wise of heart will heed commandments, but a babbling fool will come to ruin. 
14        The wise lay up knowledge, but the babbling of a fool brings ruin near.
18        Lying lips conceal hatred, and whoever utters slander is a fool. 
21        The lips of the righteous feed many, but fools die for lack of sense. 
23        Doing wrong is like sport to a fool,  but wise conduct is pleasure to a person of understanding.
12:15   Fools think their own way is right, but the wise listen to advice.
16        Fools show their anger at once, but the prudent ignore an insult.
14:7     Leave the presence of a fool, for there you do not find words of knowledge.
8          It is the wisdom of the clever to understand where they go, but the folly of fools misleads 
15:2     The tongue of the wise dispenses knowledge, but the mouths of fools pour out folly.
14        The mind of one who has understanding seeks knowledge, but the mouths of fools feed on folly. 
17:24   The discerning person looks to wisdom, but the eyes of a fool to the ends of the earth.
28        Even fools who keep silent are considered wise;  when they close their lips, they are deemed intelligent
Matthew
5:21 “You have heard that it was said to those of ancient times, ‘You shall not murder’;  and ‘whoever murders shall be liable to judgment.’ 22 But I say to you that if you are angry with a brother or sister, you will be liable to judgment; and if you insult  a brother or sister, you will be liable to the council; and if you say, ‘You fool,’ you will be liable to the hell  of fire. 23 So when you are offering your gift at the altar, if you remember that your brother or sister  has something against you, 24 leave your gift there before the altar and go; first be reconciled to your brother or sister, and then come and offer your gift. 25 Come to terms quickly with your accuser while you are on the way to court with him, or your accuser may hand you over to the judge, and the judge to the guard, and you will be thrown into prison.
 Some Questions to Ponder
1.         Briefly stated, my spiritual goal is :
2.         On a spiritual level, what I yearn for most is :
3.         My biggest spiritual challenge is:
4.         Are there aspects of your life that are holding you back spiritually? 
5.         On a scale of 1 to 5, how satisfied are you with your spiritual family/community?
6.         Do you wish you had more spiritual companions, or different ones?                
7.         Would you like to see your spiritual group or organization, change in any way?     How?
8.         Which spiritual practices and activities do you do on a regular basis?
9.         Are you nurtured by your practices?
10.       Which of those practices and activities do you wish you had more time for?
11.       Which new ones would you like to integrate into your daily or weekly routine?
12.       What might you do to make room for them in your life? 
13.       When you don’t measure up to your ideal of spiritual behavior, what do you do?
14.       What is one thing you would like to do to take better care of your soul?

Soulkeeping
When I say goodbye to people, I say “take care”…
Meaning, Be Careful, and Take care of yourself
Good self care includes, rest, exercise and diet
Or at least two out of three
The heart of self-care is soul-care. 
Soulkeeping is the process of attending to the deepest aspects of yourself—
the part of yourself
that is connected to the Mystery we call God and
that is a part of the whole we call Humanity.
Soul.  The deepest place of your being
where you feel great love, immeasurable loss,
deep pain, inexplicable joy. 
The place where you connect to the mystery and with others. 
The container for the essence of one’s self. 
Sustained by one’s values, practices, spiritual disciplines
Soul keeping is the process of soul care —
the care and nurture of one’s soul. 
Good soul care requires attention, intention and discipline
Discipline includes practice

Personal hygiene practices
Bathing, brushing teeth, deodorant
Don’t think about it, just do it
Because if you don’t, you suffer, and
we, who are around you, suffer too

Why take care of your soul?
Because a neglected or wounded soul 
is painful to be around and even worse to have.

Some questions to ponder about your spiritual life in the bulletin

I have identified Ten Disciplines of the Spirit
Ten vital spiritual practices

Ten Spiritual Practices for the care and nurture of your soul
1.            Be still and go deep – engage with the Mystery
2.            Take sabbath rest—give yourself time to restore, go to the well
3.            Live with integrity – clarify your values, align your behavior
4.            Make moments meaningful—sanctify your living
5.            Create your own rituals—honor your life passages
6.            Honor your passion—allow the sparks to grow
7.            Clean up your mess—communicate with courage and compassion
8.            Nurture a generous heart—affirm the abundance of life
9.            Serve with joy—find ways to give to the world
10.            Forgive yourself—be gentle with yourself as you grow


This morning we are focusing on #7 
Clean up your mess
physical, relational and spiritual

Can you
·      Cook in a dirty kitchen
·      Work in a cluttered office
·      Drive in a filthy car
·      Concentrate on just one thing when your mind is racing?
Can you
·      Listen to a sermon when you’ve got errands to run
·      Read a book or watch a TV program surrounded by chaos

Probably can’t.  I cant. 
Sometimes I try to convince myself that I can
But I know I can’t do them as well as I can in an orderly environment

Clean up your mess is a theme on reality TV…
Heard on NPR this week
Having someone do it for you doesn’t help
Each person needs to be in control of how they attend to their messes
Sometimes people cannot get rid of the mess, they can just organize it
Limit it to one room
make pathways in each room
So that you can at least get out in an emergency

Sharpen Your Saw
Popularized by Stephen Covey – First things First
Can’t sharpen a saw in a dirty, disorganized, unsafe setting

Cleaning up your mess as a spiritual practice
Has the same focus.

I’m a consultant and most of my work
is helping people to clean up their messes
Some messes are physical, some are structural some are interpersonal
I have a belief that the state of your closets and drawers
are a reflection of the state of your mind.
Feng shui is based on that principle
Look at most introductions to feng shui and they will say
Want to de-stress?  De-clutter!
We tend to hold onto stuff
Physical stuff
Emotional stuff
To keep from having to deal with the empty spaces in our lives
But it is only when we create empty space
that God can enter our lives meaningfully
Letting go of stuff
Detaching yourself from your stuff
is hard and important
Create a ceremony
            I release my hold on…
            I release my attachment to …
            Say thank you to each item you release
            Give it to someone who can use it
Limit your junk piles
            To a drawer
            To a box
            To a room – perhaps your garage…
Make cleaning up your mess a habit…a routine…
a spiritual practice
Relationships create the biggest messes
The discipline is in keeping the messes small
and cleaning them up quickly
Most of us value truth telling and try to follow the Golden rule
The problem is truth telling is hard and
The golden rule is usually mis-interpreted…
OT scripture, Proverbs
Talks about the fool--the ungodly person, the unwise person—
Folly and Wisdom are opposite ends of the spectrum.
Antithesis of Wisdom, a moral reprobate
About 11 different words in Hebrew and Greek
All translated by the same English term of fool.
 In the "wisdom" writings therefore an epithet.
Speaks without thinking, caring, taking responsibility
Someone who lacks wisdom and acts senselessly.
Folly is self-defeating, unprofitable behavior.
brutishness, or immature behavior,
understatement for sinfulness.
 dedicated to a life of pleasure and pleasure-seeking
rejecting God's will

By Paul's time a fool for Christ
one who rejects human conventional wisdom
and seeks only God's eternal wisdom.


Bottom line:
You don’t want to be in a relationship with a foolish person
If you already are
Good communication and healthy relationships
require discipline and discernment
requires candor and compassion…
That’s how you keep from making a mess
NT scripture says
            Before going to the temple, make amends with your brother and sister
Short version:  Clean up your mess

To clean up your mess
You must do a couple of things:
Step 4 of the 12-step programs says:
            Make a searching and fearless inventory of people you may have harmed
Step 8
            Become willing to make amends
            Ask for forgiveness
            Make amends
Forgiveness not a pass, but an opportunity to rebuild trust
Forgiveness is giving up the hope of a better past
The one who forgives, ends the argument
Clarify your intentions
Don’t blame the victims
            If they didn’t get it
            If they misunderstood
            If you hurt their feelings
Spiritual messes are a little harder to clean up
They require that you take some responsibility
They require that you exert some discipline
that you give yourself the time

When life is going well it is easy to nurture a spiritual life
When the line between you and God is clear and open,
don’t even have to think about your spiritual practices
But when your spiritual life is dry
And you need some water from the well of Life
It is nice to already know what to do

When you are on your way to the emergency room
You don’t want to stop and program your GPS
You want to already know several ways to get there
That’s what spiritual discipline is
That’s why you need spiritual practices
And that is why you need to clean up your mess.


Summarize
Good self care important—
go for two out of three: rest, exercise, nutrition
Heart of self care is soul care
Soul is the space where God resides within you

Soul Keeping
Routine and disciplined use of spiritual practices
I’ve identified ten
Go for One

Take care of yourself, Take care of your soul
And clean up your mess



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